You Think You’re Processing Your Emotions… But You’re Not.

here’s what to do instead …

If you’ve ever tried to “sit with your emotions” and ended up spiraling in your head instead, you’re not alone.

You might think you’re feeling your feelings… but you’re actually thinking about them.

This post is for you if :

– You overanalyze every emotion
– You struggle to get out of your head and into your body
– You’ve been told to “just feel it,” but don’t know how

Let’s break it down together — and teach you how to actually feel a feeling (without needing a psychology degree to do it).

What Does It Actually Mean to “Feel Your Feelings”?

Feeling your feelings doesn’t mean journaling your way into clarity or labeling every emotional nuance.

It’s simpler than that.

Feeling a feeling means noticing what’s happening in your body — the physical sensations, the subtle shifts, the energy inside of you.

That’s it.

The problem? Most of us were never taught how to do this. Especially if we were raised by Boomer parents who prioritized logic, “getting over it”, or pretending it wasn’t there to begin with.

Step 1: Set the Intention That All Feelings Are Allowed

Before you can feel anything, you have to know you’re allowed to feel it.

So many of us shut down emotions before they even start — because we’ve internalized the idea that certain feelings are wrong, bad, or too much.

Let’s rewrite that story.

Try this mantra :
“All of my feelings are always allowed.”

You don’t have to act on them. You don’t have to justify them.
You just have to let them exist.

Step 2: Get Curious About What’s Happening inside Your Body

Once you’ve made space for your emotions, bring your attention inward.

Ask yourself :
– What do I notice in my body right now?
– What sensations are here?

Then slow your breath and listen. You might feel tension, tightness, fluttering, heat, heaviness — whatever it is, observe it without trying to change it.

To expand on this, you may also explore :
– If the sensation has a color?
– If the sensation has a temperature?
– If the sensation has a shape, movement, or vibration?

There is literally no right or wrong here. Let whatever shows up (even if it’s nothing at all) just exist without trying to rationalize, justify, or change it. You’re not solving a puzzle — you’re meeting yourself with curiosity.

Step 3: Let the Feeling Express Itself (Safely)

Here’s the part most people skip… and it’s one of the most powerful.

Important disclaimer : expression is NOT about acting out. It is NEVER about hurting yourself or anyone else. Expression is about SAFELY creating a container for energy to move.

Feelings are energy. And energy wants to move.

Once you’ve identified the feeling (sensation), ask yourself :
– If the sensation had a sound, what would it be?
– If the sensation had a facial expression that would match it perfectly, what would that look like?
– If the sensation had movement, how could I show that movement?
– If the sensation had words, what would I say out loud?

Let yourself follow the impulse safely and intentionally.

Step 4: Pause, Check In, and Re-Enter Your Day

Once you feel complete for the moment, ask yourself :

** Note : you may want to come back and revisit at another time — this is not a one and done type of endeavor

— Do I need anything right now?

— Water, a nap, some rest?

— Give yourself what you need.

Then gently shift back into your day. Make a written or voice note of what you experienced if it feels helpful, not as a way to report in but as a way to acknowledge what you processed.

Learning to hold your feelings is a skill and a muscle. This muscle gets strengthened through reps and intention.

Why This Matters (Especially If You have an active mind)

When you allow your emotions to exist without needing to fix them — you reclaim internal safety.

You stop reacting. You stop spiraling.
Because you start trusting yourself to have your own back.

Feeling your feelings isn’t weakness. It’s a superpower.

Want Help Putting This Into Practice?

🎧 Grab my free 14-minute guided audio (+ 10-page workbook) to help you feel your feelings without getting stuck in your head.

It’s designed to gently guide you back into your body — so you can process your emotions with clarity and confidence.

👉 Click HERE to gain access now 👈